Gentrification takes flight
According to reports, Brooklyn has entered its next wave of ironic capitalism: pigeon rentals. For $50 an hour, locals can rent a “curated urban pigeon experience,” complete with artisanal birdseed and an Instagram handler who makes sure the pigeon looks effortlessly disheveled in photos.
“Owning a dog is basic,” explained one Williamsburg resident. “A pigeon says Im city-savvy but also emotionally unavailable.”
The pigeon rental business offers different packages: The “Classic Rooftop” comes with three pigeons and a vintage fire escape backdrop. The “Deluxe Union Square” sends your pigeon flock into battle with squirrels. The “VIP Loft” includes a pigeon fitted with a tiny leather jacket and ironic mustache sticker.
Not everyone is thrilled. “These birds already poop everywhere,” groaned a landlord in Bushwick. But demand is soaring. “We had a waitlist of 300 by day one,” bragged the startup founder. Investors are circling, hoping to turn pigeon rental into “the next CitiBike.”
TikToks #PigeonRental showcases influencers kissing pigeons, pigeons stealing cold brew, and a viral clip of one pigeon DMing a strangers ex from a borrowed iPhone. Animal rights activists warn the trend may stress birds, but hipsters insist the pigeons enjoy being part of the gig economy.
Tabloids flapped in: The Post screamed: “FOWL PLAY.” The Daily News countered: “COO-L KIDS.”
Mayor Adams supported it: “As long as the pigeons pay taxes.” Governor Hochul muttered, “If pigeons get health insurance before gig workers, Im banning feathers.”
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/brooklyn-hipsters-start-renting-pigeons/
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/brooklyn-hipsters-start-renting-pigeons/.
By: Annika Steinmann.
