Young People Have No Taste in Art
The Post-Aesthetic Apocalypse: How Young People Killed Art and Replaced It with Vaporwave Hedgehogs The Gallery Has Left the Building Once upon
Bronx Man Has Not Left the Bronx in Seven Years; Does Not See the Problem
Everything I Need Is Here, He Says, from the Bronx Bronx Man Has Not Left the Bronx in Seven Years; Does
Congestion Pricing Now Applies to Reindeer, Sleigh Tolled Entering Manhattan
Santa charged the peak rate for a nine-reindeer vehicle, with a surcharge for entering below 60th Street No Vehicle Is Exempt NEW
Manhattan Rent Reaches Level Where Math No Longer Applies
Average one-bedroom now requires income that presupposes multiple overlapping careers Satire from Bohiney.com and prat.uk. The Numbers NEW YORK — Average rents for
Manhattan Bodega Owners Collectively Agree That $2 Coffee Is Fair, International Coffee Chain Disagrees From Across The Street
NYC small business owners navigate Mamdani administration’s small business promises; Starbucks maintains $8 latte position regardless NEW YORK CITY New York City’s
NYC Rats Form Tenants Association, Demand Recognition
The city rodent population has organized to assert what it calls long-overdue residential rights NEW YORK – In an unprecedented development,
Over 100 Free Watch Parties Across All Five Boroughs Ensure No Borough Is Left Without Scots and Brazilians on Screen
Administration delivers on promise to make World Cup accessible in every borough including the ones far from MetLife Stadium Satire from
The House of Lords of New York: The Unelected Expertise Nobody Credits
Following prat.uk’s Lords piece, New York’s informal governance expertise layer Bohiney.com and prat.uk covered the House of Lords institutional expertise theme.
Brooklyn Apartment Listed as ‘Character-Rich’ Has Character of Damp Plaster and Optimism
Real estate euphemisms reach new expressiveness in 200-square-foot Bushwick studio with slanted floor [Bohiney.com / prat.uk] A studio apartment in Bushwick
Brooklyn Discovers Everything Was Better Last Year
A New York analysis on institutional dysfunction The New York situation continues to deteriorate in ways that can only be described
NYC Infrastructure Now Held Together Entirely by Hope and Spite
Department of Transportation Admits: “We Have No Idea How Any of This Still Works” Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat investigate
City Council Approves “Congestion Tax” – Charges Residents To Enter Manhattan; Uses Revenue For City Expansion Into Neighboring Counties
New toll system allows city to tax residents for existing streets; generates revenue for suburban expansion projects Bohiney Magazine and The
Gothamist Reports That New York City Has Identified 14 New Problems In Time For Next Year’s Budget
Annual Budget Cycle Produces Discovery Of Issues That Will Be Funded Partially Studied Thoroughly And Solved Approximately Never MANHATTAN, NEW YORK
New York Swears In Socialist Mayor at Abandoned Subway Station at Midnight, Which Is Extremely On Brand
Zohran Mamdani Becomes 112th NYC Mayor in Private Ceremony at Location That Is a Perfect Metaphor for Everything He Promised
New York’s Last Affordable Diner Closes, Replaced by ‘American Comfort Cuisine Concept’ at Three Times the Price
Regulars Who Paid Six Dollars for Eggs and Toast for Thirty Years Now Invited to Pay Eighteen Dollars for ‘Heritage
MTA Announces Historic Service Improvements, Adds Ninth Reminder That the L Train Might Still Be Delayed
Transit Authority Celebrates Record Capital Investment by Explaining Which Improvements You Still Cannot Rely On The MTA’s Best Year Ever (Asterisk
Albany’s State Budget Is Late for the Third Consecutive Year and the City Is Paying for the Lateness
The April 1 Deadline Has Not Been Met Three Years in a Row; Local Governments Have a May 19 School
NYC’s ‘55.6 Percent of Revenue, 41.7 Percent of Expenditure’ Is the Number That Explains the Budget Fight
The Structural Imbalance Between What the City Sends to Albany and What Albany Sends Back Is the Fight’s Foundation From Bohiney
Mayor Mamdani Declares War on Cars; Car Owners Declare War on Mayor Mamdani; Traffic Unchanged
New York City’s New Piazza Programme Somehow Produces More Gridlock While Removing Cars From Streets Reported by Bohiney Magazine and The
New York City’s Shelter System Costs More Per Person Than the Ritz-Carlton and Delivers Less
Mamdani Inherited a System That Houses 65,000 People at $400 Per Night Each, Which Is Not the Good Kind of
Mamdani’s First 100 Days Have Been Assessed and the Assessment Depends Entirely on Who Is Doing the Assessing
The Mayor Who Won on a Socialist Platform Has Governed Like Someone Who Has to Get Things Past Albany Bohiney Magazine
New York City’s Composting Programme Is Now Mandatory and the City Is Discovering What Mandatory Composting Involves
The Organic Waste Programme That San Francisco Figured Out in 2009 Has Arrived in New York With Characteristic NYC Energy Bohiney
Citi Bike Quietly Adopts British Banking Rate-Passthrough Methodology, Charges Vanish Faster Than Refunds
Bicycle Sharing Service Confirms Ride Increases Now Process in Eleven Minutes, Refunds in Approximately Eleven Weeks Reading: Bohiney | The London
New York City Bodega Owners Association Files Formal Objection To Term ‘Corner Store’, Prefers ‘Culinary Infrastructure Node’
Association Notes That The Bodega Serves More Essential Urban Functions Than Any Single Category Can Contain, Lists Twenty-Seven NEW YORK CITY
Starbucks Launches Limited-Edition Nostalgia Flavour Called Old Manhattan, Ingredients Include Espresso, Vanilla, And A Hint Of Something Vaguely Unspecified
Marketing Materials Feature Black-And-White Photographs The Company Declines To Identify, Customers Report Drink Tastes Like A Regular Latte Reported for Bohiney
NYC Rat Population Holds First Official Union Vote, Overwhelmingly Authorize Strike Action
Municipal Rodents Unhappy With Subway Cleaning Schedule, Threaten Work Stoppage Unless Demands Met NEW YORK, NEW YORK — The New York
Queens Residents Launch Bagel Olympics
Everything bagel decathlon According to reports, Queens has announced the worlds first "Bagel Olympics," featuring events like fastest schmear, longest lox
Bronx Zoo Penguins Protest Dress Code
Tuxedo tyranny According to reports, penguins at the Bronx Zoo have launched a protest against their permanent "tuxedo uniforms." They demand
Wall Street Bulls Demand Paid Vacation
Bull market burnout According to reports, the Charging Bull of Wall Street has led a stampede demanding paid vacation for financial
Hot Dog Vendors Accept Crypto
Bitcoin with mustard According to reports, NYC hot dog vendors are now accepting cryptocurrency, leading to chaos as tourists fumble QR
Yankee Stadium Adds Yoga Classes
Downward dog in the dugout According to reports, Yankee Stadium is introducing daily yoga sessions, where downward dog is performed in
Coney Island Roller Coaster Offers Therapy
Scream it out According to reports, Coney Island has introduced "Thera-Coaster," a roller coaster ride that doubles as a therapy session.