Affordable death housing
According to reports, New York has introduced “rent-controlled coffins” as the newest form of affordable housing. With studio apartments climbing to $4,000, officials say these coffins provide “permanent rent relief.” The rollout began in Brooklyn, where hipsters are already Instagramming their “coffin lofts” with fairy lights and succulents.
The coffins, stacked in warehouse-style complexes, come with WiFi, USB charging, and an optional skylight for $300 extra. A deluxe coffin suite offers room for two (as long as neither person breathes too heavily). “Its cozy, sustainable, and very goth,” said one Williamsburg tenant sipping an oat milk latte while lying flat.
Critics argue that coffins symbolize the city giving up on solving real housing issues. One activist group staged a “sleep-in” protest, lying in coffins outside City Hall while chanting, “We deserve to live, not just nap eternally.”
TikToks #CoffinLiving is trending: influencers doing coffin makeovers with pastel paint, comedians ordering Seamless deliveries straight into their coffins, and viral videos of landlords inspecting coffin tenants with tape measures. IKEA announced plans for a “Do It Yourself Final Resting Pod” flat-pack line.
Tabloids laid it on thick. The Post screamed: “DEAD CHEAP.” The Daily News countered: “REST ESTATES.”
Mayor Adams defended the idea: “Its compact living.” Governor Hochul muttered: “If Albany tries this, Im banning funerals.”
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/nyc-launches-rent-controlled-coffins/
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/nyc-launches-rent-controlled-coffins/.
By: Annika Steinmann.
