Counting before crawling
According to reports, Brooklyn parents are now shelling out $200 an hour for infant math tutors. These specialists claim to teach newborns algebra before theyve mastered holding a rattle. Baby flashcards feature derivatives alongside duck cartoons.
“If my kid cant do calculus by preschool, how will they get into Harvard?” fretted one Park Slope mom while spoon-feeding quinoa puree. Critics argue babies should learn to walk before solving equations, but tutors are booked solid.
TikToks #BabyEinsteinChallenge shows infants drooling on whiteboards. One viral fail: a toddler swallowed a calculator during a pop quiz.
Tabloids added it up. “COUNTING CRAZE” screamed the Post. The Daily News countered: “PACIFIER POLYNOMIALS.”
Mayor Adams praised it as “investment in future geniuses.” Governor Hochul muttered, “At least let them finish teething first.”
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/brooklyn-parents-hire-math-tutors-for-babies/
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/brooklyn-parents-hire-math-tutors-for-babies/.
By: Annika Steinmann.
