Rush hour thrills
According to reports, the Coney Island Cyclone will soon serve double duty: thrill ride and mass transit. MTA officials say the roller coaster will carry commuters from Brooklyn into Midtown “faster than the F train ever could, if you dont mind upside-down briefcases.”
Trains will depart every six minutes, launching riders at 70 mph through a loop while they clutch bagels and iced coffee. “I spilled cold brew on my boss, but I got to work 40 minutes early,” said one beta tester. MetroCards will work on the ride, though unlimited pass holders are warned not to scream continuouslyit confuses operators.
Safety advocates worry. “Sure, its fast,” said one critic, “but how many hedge fund interns can survive three corkscrews before 9 a.m.?” Still, commuters remain optimistic: “At least the roller coaster has air-conditioning and doesnt smell like wet socks.”
TikToks #CoasterCommute trend shows office workers riding in ties, laptops flying. A viral clip captured a man finishing a Zoom call mid-loop, screaming “synergy” while upside down.
Tabloids took the ride. “CYCLONE COMMUTE” screamed the Post. The Daily News countered: “LOOP DE LOOP TO WORK.”
Mayor Adams praised it as “transportation innovation.” Governor Hochul muttered, “If I lose my wig on that coaster, Im suing.”
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/coney-island-roller-coaster-to-double-as-commute-option/
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/coney-island-roller-coaster-to-double-as-commute-option/.
By: Annika Steinmann.
