Recess Banned at Charter School After Kids Use It for Startups
At Silicon Grove Charter Academy, recess was once a sacred time for tag, jump rope, and covert Pokémon trading. That is, until a group of 3rd graders launched a venture capital fund under the slide. Now, the school has banned recess altogether after an investigation revealed over 27 “playground-based” startups operating without board approval, juicebox audits, or nap-time equity clauses.
“We thought they were building a fort,” said one recess aide. “Turns out, it was a WeWork prototype.”
The students, calling themselves Sandbox Capital, pitched ideas ranging from blockchain tetherball to AI-powered hopscotch. One ambitious 10-year-old CEO filed a trademark for “Disrupting Duck-Duck-Goose™.”
Parents were split. Some applauded the entrepreneurial spirit. Others were furious after learning their child’s startup was valued at $13 million in imaginary tokens and had already laid off the monkey bars.
Principal Leann Stack released a statement: “We support innovation, but we draw the line at hostile takeovers of the sandbox.”
Meanwhile, the students have filed for recess-as-a-service (RaaS) and plan to outsource fun to Bangalore.
When asked what they’ll do now during break, one founder replied, “Pivot to mindfulness NFTs. Tag is for boomers.”
