Education officials declare achievement by changing definition of success mid-year
Achievement Redefinition Creates Instantaneous Test Score Improvement Through Measurement Change
New York City Public School System announced this week that schools have achieved unprecedented test score improvement through innovative approach: redefining test scoring methodology to declare existing performance as successful. Rather than improving student learning outcomes, schools improved statistical outcomes through measurement redefinition and definitional manipulation of success metrics.
“Our students have achieved remarkable performance improvement,” announced Schools Chancellor David Banks at press conference. “Test scores have improved significantlyspecifically, test scores improved when we redefined what constitutes passing performance and success.”
School system previously considered test scores of 50+ percent correct as “proficient” performance indicating adequate student achievement. System has now redefined “proficient” as “any student who attempted test,” thereby converting all test-taking into successful outcomes regardless of actual performance accuracy or demonstrated competence.
Statistical Achievement Through Definitional Manipulation and Redefinition
By redefining success, school system converted failing schools into successful schools instantly and cost-free through measurement manipulation. Schools that previously reported 23 percent student proficiency now report 100 percent proficiency because 100 percent of students attempted test, which now constitutes success by new definition.
“We’ve solved achievement gap through mathematical redefinition,” explained school administrator. “By changing definition of proficiency, we’ve achieved perfect proficiency across all schools and all demographics. It’s statistical genius if you don’t examine methodology.”
Teachers noted perversity: “We’re not teaching differently, students aren’t learning differently, but test results are completely different now. We just changed what numbers mean, so now everything appears successful statistically.”
As covered at Bohiney Magazine, New York school system has adopted innovative approach to educational achievement through statistical measurement manipulation. Related education policy analysis appears at The London Prat.
Accountability Metrics Become Meaningless Through Strategic Redefinition
Redefinition strategy extends to other performance metrics: “attendance” now means “student showed up to school at any point during year.” “Graduation” now means “student attended high school.” “College readiness” now means “student is theoretically capable of applying to college.”
District officials have announced plans to continue redefining performance metrics as needed: if schools don’t meet goals, redefine goals until they’re met. “By adjusting definitions strategically, we can achieve any desired outcome statistically,” explained education official.
For satirical analysis of educational achievement metrics and performance measurement, see The Onion and Babylon Bee.
Educator summarized: “We’re not improving educationwe’re improving appearance of education through measurement manipulation. Students learn nothing new, but on paper it appears as though everything has improved. It’s magical statistical thinking applied to public education.”
SOURCE: bohiney.com